So I borrowed Sara's much balleyhooed book, Getting Serious About Getting Married by Debbie Maken. I have read all seven glamorous pages of chapter one and already I have learned an important lesson: I shouldn't read it before going to bed. My mind is racing with arguments and with nearly every sentence I find myself scribbling a rebuttal on my set of notes. This book is infuriating. It's sad because I suspect that I will agree with some of her opinions later in the book (i.e. the presence pf prolonged adolescence in our culture and the need to proactively pursue romantic interests rather than idly waiting by in some sort of romantic fatalism), but her writing feels a bit like having smoke blown constantly in your eyes. I'm not sure if this book will change my overall perspective on singleness and marriage, but one thing I can say is I'm thankful I'm not married to that woman.
Oh, and she also has a blog. This is amusing. After commenting about her own book that "Last year in January, the death knell for the so-called 'gift of singleness' began with the unleashing of Getting Serious About Getting Married: Rethinking the Gift of Singleness" she quickly adds that "I am humbled that these Christian organizations would think me worthy of delivering a message on singleness." Yeah, describing your own book is a "death knell" strikes me as a pretty humble statement too.
6 comments:
Yeah def. dont read before bed. There were a few times where she really ticked me off with some of the things she wrote. it's funny she sounds so bitter about geing single it's almost as if she isnt married. I guess she doesnt quite grasp that God is in control of all things and when it is His time you will get married, but not before.
Yes, Steve, this book should have come with a warning label: "Please do not read before going to bed." I've read the entire book and some of it still infuriates me. I agreed with some points, but her bitterness overshadowed the good of the book. I wish I could have those few hours back that I took to read it.
I almost want to read this just so I can figure out what is making all of you so upset. However, I'm at a plateau where I don't care if I ever get married or not . . . so whatever God brings into my life He will bring in and I'm going to be happy regardless. Thus, I don't see the point in reading this book. It may mess up the happy groove I have going.
Dating/marriage books are baloney. Christians way overthink this stuff. The only good "dating/marriage" book that I have ever read was "Finding the Love of Your Life" by Dr. Neil Clark Warren.
Wow, I just checked out her blog and I have to say I was insulted by some of the comments that she as well as others made.
Clearly, I am screwing up male leadership in the family and the church somehow by being a smart, motivated woman pursuing an advanced degree and career, with no intention of being a traditional "stay-at-home-mom." Apparently, according to the "statistics" (which I am sure are not from a valid/reliable source) I am a minority.
Honestly, if I were not a Christian and didn't know what the TRUTH was I would be totally turned off by the church and the attitudes of many Christians about male/female relationships.
Honestly, I'm not sure why it's such a big stinking deal. Can't we just be equals and respect each other? I feel like the going on and on about male leadership kind of puts both men AND women down. I see a lot of male leadership in the church. Especially since many churches do not allow female elders, etc. Have any of the women I've heard complaining thought that it could be a personality mix, not a general lack of leadership?
And, I enjoy being single. I have had some awesome experiences and been able to do some really cool things that definitely wouldn't have happened, had I been married. I know a lot of Kairosians disagree with me, but I think being single is great fun!
Here, here, Bec.
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